Lost in Amsterdam Finale: The Bitter End

Slowly Noteboom turned and responded with,

“Right. OK. Here’s another option: You can drop off the saddlebag with the money on the Northwest corner of Dijk Road and Amsterdam Road and they drop off your daughter at the mouth of the Lewis and Clark Caverns down by the river at exactly the same time.”

“Is that Mexican time or Dutch time? What time might that be?”

“I would suggest it be late in the day so as to provide as much protection from traffic and interference by other people for all parties involved. How does midnight sound to you folks?”

“It’s pretty damn dark at midnight. What if the lights on the Harley aren’t working? Besides I’d have to leave the Missus at home to make room for our difficult daughter in the side car.”

“Choices again, Admiral. You’re where the buck stops, remember?”

“Ja. And starts. So what then?”

“Then you take her home by way of the One of Life’s Lessons short cut and after they take the money out of the saddlebag they go up the Old Yellowstone Trail back from the Amsterdam and Dijk intersection by way of the Field of Gold and the Willow Creek Homestead. I’ll settle score with them on my own and you can pick up your empty saddlebag at your convenience if it’s still there in the morning”

“That seems like a whole lot of trouble just to give away the fruits of a lifetime of work and saving just to reclaim a daughter that since birth has been a huge pain in the ass and a burgeoning financial drain and burden to her grieving parents.”

“What a sensitive, caring, thoughtful and calculated response. Is that a Gopher It?”

The Admirals’ innate greed and avarice overcame his self–righteous upbringing.

“NO. Potferdicky!”

His wife’s gasp of sucking air like the shot heard around the world could be heard in the next county.

“Henny, how could you?”

Drunk with the power of persuasion and reasoning beyond dispute, the Admiral continued,

“I’ve got a better solution.”

“What is it?”

“You can keep most of the plan you’ve hatched but with the following changes; We’ll put five thousand in the saddlebag, not a hundred thousand and . . . they can keep it, only and I mean only, if they keep her, too and never ever bring her back. If they can’t keep their part of the bargain, all deals are off and we’ll give all of them an all-expenses paid trip to Deer Lodge and an all-inclusive vacation with amenities in the State Penitentiary.”

No sooner did the Admiral’s remark sink in than Noteboom’s expectations began to evaporate. His dreams of future profit from Vogelpoop’s fraudulant scheme float away in the mist and clouds of the Admiral’s abrupt summary judgement.

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